Unselfish and Unnatural
by Marie S Zachary
Summary: Stottlemyer has to make an unusual decision when he's caught in between a rock and a hard place. Both choices would have disasterious consequences but only one choice was the right one to make. As much as it killed him he knew he couldn't save Karen


Disclaimer: Other then the unborn baby I don't own any of this

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By nature most men are selfish. They don't mean to be selfish. It's just a gut reaction. They will save their own and let the others fall at the wasteland. Captain Leland Stottlemyer was by nature a selfish man. He was a good man. He loved his wife and his children. But he was also a selfish man. He was a good friend. He loved his friends. But he was also a selfish man. One day however the day would come when he was unable to be selfish.  
That day he wanted to be selfish. If he could have been selfish he would have been without looking back. But it wasn't about Karen. Karen's life wasn't important at that moment. Did he love her? Of course he did. Would he always love her? Of course he would. That wasn't the issue at hand. He was in the parking garage when that bomb went off. He could feel the fire. He could hear both his wife and Monk's wife screaming in fear… unable to get out.  
He didn't have time to think about it. Trudy and Adrian had a baby daughter on the way. Instinctively he went to save his friend's wife.

_NO_, he screamed out in his mind, _KAREN SAVE KAREN  
_His mind screamed out but his body would not obey. Using the STRODDLE he caused the fire to be put out. Then he called for an ambulance.  
Adrian was in the office when he got the call  
"Hello? Oh my GOD… I'll be right there"  
He hung up the phone  
"Monk," Christie asked, "are you okay?"  
Monk shook his head  
"Something happened to Trudy," he said, "I have to get down to San Fran General. Could you cover for me"  
"Of course"  
Down in San Fran General Leland was pacing the halls when the doctor came out.  
"The first victim brought in is going to be fine. She has mild burns and a few welts but they will heal shortly. We need to keep her overnight to make sure everything is okay. The second victim was in the car for too long. We did everything we could but unfortunately Mrs. Stottlemyer passed away."  
Just then Monk came running in  
"TRUDY. WHERE IS SHE?"  
Stottlemyer felt numb. He put an hand on his friend's shoulder.  
"She's going to be fine Monk," Stottlemyer said, "minor burns and a couple of welts from the STROTTLE… had to do it to put the fire out"  
"Why are you crying?"  
Stottlemyer wiped away a tear.  
"Karen was in the car too. I couldn't save them both"  
For a minute Adrian just stared at his friend. It wasn't until much later that the magnitude of Leland's words sunk in. The Captain had acted as a true friend and only a true friend would. Leland saw the question in Monk's eyes. He clearly wanted to know and probably needed to know why he made the choice he did.  
"It wasn't a choice," Leland said, "it was instinct. If I had let her die I would have not only been letting her die but the baby too. There… there may be times that I- that I get mad and I apologize in advance for that"  
Monk knew his own protective nature and he knew after this happened he would be extra protective of Trudy. There was no doubt things had changed. It was like an unspoken fact.  
"The doctor said she would be released tomorrow if there's no infection or the like but she's going to be put on bed rest."  
Adrian saw the wisdom in that. He wasn't about to argue something that was intelligent. A few minutes later the doctor came out again  
"Mr…. Monk right?"  
"Yes. C-"  
"You can go see your wife now. She's been asking for you. But you might want to hold out on telling her that her friend died"  
"Thank you," Monk said crying with relief and overwhelmed ness, "I will"  
"Remember," he added, "this may not be the easiest situation in the world. It may be a good idea to just take a step backwards for a little while… until everything is better at least"  
"I didn't plan on not doing that"  
"Anyway," the doctor said, "you can see her now"  
As Adrian left Leland Stottlemyer sat in the chair feeling empty and alone. His wife… his world was gone in an instant. He felt angry. THIS WAS SO GOD DAMN UNFAIR. He had two boys. How was he supposed to raise his sons? They needed their mother. He sank down and started to cry. He cried until there was nothing left of him to cry. That was when he saw Max (age 3) and Jarred (age 13) come in through the entrance doors  
"Daddy," Max said, "Aunt Maggie brought us here. Why did aunt Maggie brought us here"  
"Sit down son," Leland told Jarred and pcked Max up putting him in his lap, "I have something to tell you. This is a really hard thing to say and when you hear this you may want to cry and it's okay to cry. Mommy was in an accident. She was hurt really badly and she was hurt too badly to get better."  
"Where is she now?"  
"She's in heaven Maxie," Stottlemyer said, "It's going to be tough but we're all going to get through it"  
"It's going to be okay," Jarred said comforting his little brother who had just started to cry, "mom's still with us… just in a different place" 


End file.
